McDonald’s Is A Weird, Strange Place, And We’re McLovin It

Our entire world changed on April 15, 1955, when the first McDonald’s opened in Illinois. Since that day, billions of people have been served hamburgers, fries, ice cream, and sometimes — disappointment.

Not every fast food joint is perfect, but McDonald’s has set the bar as far as what we expect. Frankly, it’s oftentimes not very much. The ice cream machine never works, and things just haven’t been the same since they stopped making pizza (yes, that was a thing you’ve probably forgotten about). But when people are planking on the golden arches, you know things have fallen off the rails. Read on to enjoy only the best from really any McDonald’s. They’re doing their best, I’m sure.

I Can’t Imagine What He Found In There

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Photo Credit: Reddit / BaronOshawott

Now, I’m not saying you can’t find some good stuff in the trash can. If Oscar the Grouch has taught us anything, it’s that you can find beauty in even the most disgusting places. However, if this is like any McDonald’s I’ve been in, there’s probably a ridiculous amount of mayo and ketchup in there.

Also, there’s a really good chance that a few stale fries are stabbing him in the shins right now. Hopefully, he hits the bathroom after this and covers himself in hand sanitizer.

I’m Sorry Boys, But You Need A Running Motor

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Photo Credit: Reddit / redonculous

Life is all about finding the loopholes, but even these four freethinkers couldn’t convince this manager that their car deserved the drive-thru treatment. This will always be one of the most ridiculous rules we have in our world. How can a drive-thru be open 24 hours, but unless I have a car, I’m out of luck?

These guys took it upon themselves to go out and prove a point, and I’ll be honking in solidarity behind them.

Look How Far We’ve Come

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Photo Credit: Reddit / TatumStrangely01

Remember when planking was all the rage? People would go out and just lay on things and take pictures, and the world was a simpler, and easier place.

I think we all wish we could go back to the times we were all outraged that some kid would go out and lay perfectly straight on a park bench. Now, the kids are eating tide pods. What happened to us? McDonald’s isn’t just a great place to plank, it’s also a great place to throw a dance party, as you’ll see in a bit.

Only One Clown To Rule Us All

Only One Clown To Rule Us All

Photo Credit: Imgur

I feel that this McDonald’s is ready to start some kind of town takeover, and I for one am ready to bow down to our redhaired overlord. He has all the marks of a successful overload, but I think the most telling is that smile. It’s infectious.

An important part of taking over a town (or at least I assume) is having some sort of control over the population. By hoarding all of the chicken nuggets, this clown should be in charge by Friday.

When You’re Out Of Cones

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Photo Credit: Reddit

It’s all bread, right? They’re famous for having ice cream machines that literally never work, so on the off-chance, you actually find a working one, you’d like to think it would be worth it. Instead, they decide to experiment with their new ‘ice-cream sandwich’ and completely ruin your meal.

I’ll admit, one of the most consistent parts of a McDonald’s meal is the bun, but there hasn’t been a time when I’ve thought adding ice cream could be the difference maker we all deserve.

More Than Just A Late Night Menu

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Photo Credit: Reddit / FiveYearsAgoOnReddit

Who said you can’t have a dance party at McDonald’s? If you’re old enough to know that McDonald’s used to be the perfect place to host a children’s birthday party, you’re probably now old enough to realize that it needs a DJ.

Maybe you’re already passed your dance club phase, but if this DJ is playing ‘Don’t Stop Believing,’ you can bet it’s going to be lit. If your kid is having a breakdown, you’d better grab your phone and make sure you capture it for the ‘gram.

He’s Always Watching Over You

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Photo Credit: Imgur

Alright. Back to Lord McDonald taking over. Every Lord deserves a throne to sit on, but I don’t know why he chose this one. And what’s he looking at? This is no place for flash photography, and I don’t need a second squatter by my side.

I appreciate McDonald’s always having a watchful eye over the place to make sure everyone is safe and employees wash their hands, but I think the clown has gone too far this time.

I See You

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Photo Credit: Imgur

This is just another reason why I stick to the drive-thru line. Sure, it might require me to sit in a car as I’m blowing carbon dioxide into the air and killing our planet, but if this is the alternative, please forgive me.

Anyone who opts for the in-store option just to creep out everyone in line deserves their food in a timely manner, and I’ll make sure to stay out of the way. He can have my fries too if he wants them.

A Tragic Moment

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Photo Credit: Imgur / slipcase

I think we’ve all had that moment when we drop our food or drink and have an immediate breakdown. Usually, it’s because of the tragic outcome — maybe we don’t have a backup snack, or maybe mom’s pulling into the driveway and you have to clean this mess up while also starving to death.

However, this kid just flat out gave up, and his dad found it all too funny. Instead of consoling his son, he grabbed his phone to take as many pictures as possible. This is me as a dad 100%. If you ask for cheese on the side, don’t be surprised when they deliver. More on that coming up.

No One Cared Who I Was Before I Put On The Mask

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Photo Credit: Imgur

I think one of the weirder things that have become increasingly common is fast food joints asking you for your name. Now, I get it. It should, in theory, make it easier to get ahold of whoever’s food is ready and get it in their hands as quickly as possible. However, it’s not that simple.

When 4 Marks all get a Big Mac, everything falls apart. Why don’t you just use the number that’s already on the receipt? People need to be held accountable for keeping track of their food. It’s not hard.

Back In Old Country

Back In Old Country

Photo Credit: Imgur / ejach2000

Like we said in the beginning, McDonald’s has been around since 1955. While some things have changed inside the restaurant, the biggest changes have occurred on the outside.

There have been advances in technology, and the cars you get through the drive-thru are pretty different from the four-wheelers of the ’50s. That being said, some people are still doing things the old-fashioned way. You’ve got to respect that.

Cheese On The Side

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Photo Credit: Reddit / MatthewSabia

As much as I want to believe that this is some kind of joke, unfortunately, I’ve worked in the food-service industry. Things can get a little robotic, and you simply do what the instructions say. When someone orders a hamburger and add cheese instead of just ordering a cheeseburger, you just have to match their request.

So when someone orders a cheeseburger and asks to hold the cheese, and simultaneously add cheese on the side, you have no choice but to slap down a slice and call it a day. No one’s going to be happy with this order anyway. If you’re the ultimate McDonald’s fan, your competition is on the way.

How Many Clowns Can Fit On A Subway?

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Photo Credit: Reddit / technoks

When there’s a clown convention in town, you should probably just stay in for the weekend. There is literally no good that can come from walking out the door. These Ronald’s saw their chance to wreak havoc on the city, and it looks like their first victim is sitting in that stroller.

As we all know, McDonald’s got to us early in our childhood with toys and Happy Meals, but no one looks happy on this joy ride.

The Ultimate Happy Meal Toy

The Ultimate Happy Meal Toy

Photo Credit: Reddit / Hormander

Ok. Now we’re talking. Few things are sadder than the state of the toy selection at McDonald’s nowadays. I get that parents are trying to protect their kids from eating fast food, so curbing the toys that those very same parents got when they were kids is smart from their point.

But think of the children! There’s a world out there where a book is the perfect McDonald’s toy. A BOOK! What has this world come to in recent days?

The Final Boss Battle Over The Extra Pickles

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Photo Credit: Reddit / andychon

There’s being a fan, and there’s being this woman. There are some design patterns out there that should never be adopted, so to see them on a seat and a dress just screams ‘fashion disaster.’

I wonder if the print went on sale, and they both just had to pounce. This is like going to prom and seeing someone wearing the same dress as you — but their actually a chair. How humiliating. If you thought Ronald was scary, this next clown coming up will make him look like… well, still a clown. But a much nicer looking clown.

When Mom Thinks She’s Slick

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Photo Credit: Reddit

Remember everything I said about those health-conscious parent’s who are trying to keep all the good toys out of the Happy Meals? Ya, this is them at home. Imagine sitting down to a nice family meal, and you mom sets this down in front of you. Imagine the horror?

There is nothing good about this, and we still DON’T HAVE A REASONABLE HAPPY MEAL TOY! Why do people think this is acceptable? I would probably have to walk out and get a new family.

I Don’t Think They Know Their Audience

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Photo Credit: Reddit / rutefoot

This isn’t just for the typical McDonald’s customer, but really anyone who eats fast food… or steps foot out of their bathroom. Who can fit in a bathroom this skinny? This would be the ultimate challenge for anyone looking to order off the dollar menu.

While we’ve learned how to be a little bit more frugal with our purchases, I don’t think there’s a diet plan out there that will allow me to step through that door frame.

It Was A Weird Rebranding Effort

It Was A Weird Rebranding Effort

Photo Credit: Reddit / Igiveoutupvotes

Ronald McDonald has such an iconic look, so let’s be thankful that their rebranding efforts haven’t been able to give him a new age look. Quite frankly, they’ve found a way to make the least-terrifying clown possible, so any changes are only going to be for the worse.

That being said, there are still some people out there that are pushing for a complete makeover, and I’m at the very least intrigued. This renegade clown in the background of this photo has a certain look about him that says “I’m hungry, and could use at least $12 worth of burgers.”

A Match Made In Heaven

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Photo Credit: Reddit / travisofarabia

It feels like fewer relationships are standing the test of time. Divorces are at an all-time high, and marriages are becoming a thing of the past. So when you see two obvious soulmates get married at the top of a McDonald’s-sponsored slide with Ronald looking over them, you can’t help but weep.

Love is clearly still in the air, and we should all believe that that one special someone is just a McFlurry away.

They’ve Had One Too Many

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Photo Credit: Imgur / mcfist

Everyone knows that comfort food is only good in moderation. There’s a reason why you shouldn’t hit up the drive-thru menu every day, and it’s largely because your body just can’t take it.

Super Size Me taught us that having McDonald’s every day can really ruin your body, and they taught me that lesson on meal number three. This guy had one bad Big Mac, and now Ronald has to use whatever skills he learned before dropping out of medical school to become a clown.