Do You Do These 20 Things? Then Sorry Ladies, You’re Ridiculously Lazy!

“I’m not Lazy. I’m just on power savings mode”

Ladies, everyone needs a reason to get out of bed in the morning…actually scrap that, they really don’t. Us lazy girls have a routine and it’s called ABSOLUTELY NOTHING. Let me tell you, being lazy is an art form. It’s about simplifying things and making life easier.

However, you might be in denial about your slothful tendencies, so I’m here to call you out. If you do these things, you’re a super sloth. And if you do half of these things, you’re a sloth. Check out these bone idle acts of women to see if you’re lazy on the daily…

1. The second you get home, you strip and fling your clothes anywhere…

That bra is coming off quicker than the speed of light and will take it’s place amongst the material mountain that is your bedroom floor.

2. And that mountain of clothes includes clean ones you were too lazy to put away

Is there any part of doing laundry that isn’t torture?

3. You say ‘I’m gonna go take a shower’ and procrastinate for two hours

And when you finally did get in the shower, you get out and lie in a bath robe for another hour contemplating life before you muster up the courage to brush your hair. Life is hard.

4. You forget about cleaning the shirt you want to wear so you just spray it with perfume

We know it’s gross but did I mention how hard laundry is?

5. You wait until your phone is on 1% to run (snail pace) for a charger

Or you let it go off to completely avoid moving.

6. You drive to the store even if it’s next door to your house

Walking is overrated and the only time you’re motivated to move is if snacks are involved.

7. You sleep with stuff in your bed rather than move it

It’s FAR too much effort to move those things off your bed at night. So your laptop, phone, books and notepads are like your teddy bears.

8. It takes a substantial amount of effort to take your makeup off

So some nights you just ignore it and leave it on. Putting make up over more make up is pretty common for you too.

9. You order take out far too often

Because cooking equals effort and effort equals no. Delicious food delivered to your door? YES. The delivery girl/guy is the best sight a lazy person can ever see. Period.

10. You avoid using plates at all costs

Firstly, if you managed to cook something, kudos. But washing dishes isn’t exactly your strong point. So you use old pizza boxes, kitchen towel or just your hands to make life easier.

11. Being on time just isn’t you

Everyone is used to your punctuality (or lack thereof) by now. You’re aware you’re going to be late but that doesn’t seem to help you get up and go.

12. You wear odd socks or socks with holes in

Finding a matching pair is far too much to ask of you. And when your old socks get holes in, you’ll wear them anyway rather than change or go the store.

13. When your room or house is tidy it’s been ‘panic tidied’

Yeah, you’re definitely not familiar with cleaning and won’t do it until the house resembles a bomb site and you have guests.

14. People make comments about the fact you’re always in pyjamas

There’s nothing wrong with spending your life in pyjamas. There’s nothing comfier.

15. You don’t shave until absolutely necessary

So when you do, it has to be everything. Or alternatively, it’s just the part of you that’s on show e.g if you’re wearing high ankle jeans, just your ankles get shaved. Not just a pretty face you know? A lazy sloth too.

16. You text people in the house to do things for you

“Could you get me some chocolate from the kitchen and bring it next door to me on the couch? Please and thank you”

17. You can’t be bothered with sex or want lazy sex

Unless it’s a position where you can sit back and enjoy yourself, you find yourself lacking the energy. Missionary is the way to go. And just lying there is what you do best.

18. You use dry shampoo for days on end to avoid washing your hair

Getting IN the shower is effort enough. But then combing and drying your hair after? No thank you. Dry shampoo is your holy water.

19. ‘I’ll do it later’ is the most common phrase you use

Excuses, excuses. You’re made up of ’em. And you’ll find a way out of literally any task.

20. You make your body stretch to reach things to avoid standing up

Even if it means you have one toe left on the couch rather than stand up. So usually you fall in the process. We only have ourselves to blame.

So how did you do? Are you guilty of doing these things? I say you probably are. But don’t worry girls, we’re gonna start a revolution. LAZY AND PROUD. Any other tips to help us stay as stationary as possible? Comment on our Facebook post and don’t forget to share this with all the sloths out there. And remember Acidheads, AA says…