Children these days are smarter than we give them credit for.
They’re sneaky and crafty and they’re honestly much harder to ground or punish.
It honestly makes being a parent and teaching them right from wrong much harder.
But some parents have started to get crafty themselves.
Here are some ingenious ways parents have started to ground their children.
When my son was 3 he had just basically finished potty training. He never had accidents. One day we got him a new small bath toy and let him play with it in the sink for a few minutes before bed time. Not even 10 minutes after he got in bed, he started crying. We went to check on him and he had wet the bed. So as my wife is changing the sheets I’m cleaning him up in the bathroom, when he suddenly says “Do I take a bath now?”, and then it dawned on me. So I asked, “Did you wet the bed on purpose so that we’d give you a bath so that you could play with your new toy?”. To which he hung his head and muttered “yeah”.
I stepped away for a minute, him thinking I was mad, but I was really just laughing. We cleaned him up and put him back to bed, but dang if he didn’t have the conniving to think all that through.
Sneaking ice cream out of the freezer.
It was in one of those transparent tubs, and they would eat it from one side and put it back so that the side which was still full would face me and I couldn’t tell they had eaten it (not being a fan of ice cream I rarely opened it).
When finally I decided to get the ice cream out for their pudding one day, I took out two tubs, both of which had the thinnest slither on one end on the tub creating the illusion that they were full.
My kids set up a sort of trading hub at school.
We had – still have – a discount shop in town – the 99p Store. These days it sells some real crap, but a dozen years ago (and more) it had all sorts of bankrupt stock bargains in there. Sweets, drinks, you name it.
My kid would save his pocket money, take a large knapsack, and stagger back under a humungous load of stuff. I remember the Powerade – 99p for a six-pack. And all this stuff would be clandestinely sold at school, undercutting the school shop along the way.
He got caught, of course. I think the bubblegum was his downfall – it got stuck to everything, and Enquiries Were Made.
So it all went quiet for a few weeks, and then I got home from work and my wife said: “Junior has something to tell you..” and there was the kid with the guiltiest hangdog expression you ever saw.
“I’ve been excluded from school for a week.”
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