15 Horrifying Dating Stories That’ll Make You Glad Your Not Dating

15 Horrifying Dating Stories That’ll Make You Glad Your Not Dating



“The guy who asked me out worked at a garage but he didn’t bother to shower before our date, so he showed up covered in grease. The whole night was awful, but I eventually gave up after he said, ‘You ever hang out in hospitals? I like to. Maybe just because I’m turned on by blood.’ I cannot make this s*** up.”


“I met a guy on Tinder and went to his house for a barbecue at his house. He proceeded to get high and then streaked around his backyard. I went home and never spoke to him again.”


“I went on a Tinder date at a coffee shop. He originally said he worked on Wall Street, but was actually a ‘work-from-home consultant,’ which I learned meant he was unemployed. Then he went on about how he was addicted to artificial sweeteners and ordered them online all the time. He also said he likes to cook, so I asked him what he makes and he said, ‘Anything I can use sweeteners in, like fruit soup.’ What the hell is fruit soup?! The guy sitting next to us was laughing so hard his back was shaking.“



“We were walking around, looking for a place to eat. While we perused the menu at an Indian restaurant, some winged beast flew overhead and took the most massive dump on me. There was bird poo in my hair, all over my face, and down the front of my body. As I stood there, shocked and embarrassed, I turned to see my date nearly having a stroke to hold his laughter in. Things didn’t work out.“


“A pastor at my church asked me on a date. He and I have always gotten along and he seemed cool, so I figured, why not? We met up at a nice restaurant and the evening was going so well when he told me that he’d bought us tickets to see a movie — 50 Shades of Grey. I don’t think it would have been THAT awkward if it weren’t for his intense hand-squeezing during the sex scenes of the film.“

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